Showing posts with label confidence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label confidence. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

No patients for patience

So...I'm working on my RN degree right now, and I think I hate everything about this experience. I have lab clinicals every Friday, all day. During clinicals, we are assigned a patient and our job is to just generally take care of them. We give them a bath (I hate touching people), change and make their beds (I don't make my beds at home), and then tend to their issues for which they're in the hospital. Of course I can't really discuss the patient, but I can tell you, between my pateint and the roommate, that I spent my whole morning cleaning up elderly person poop and wiping said large fanny, and the amount was astonishing. Can I really do this for THREE MORE SEMESTERS?!? I took a second to consider what other kind of patient I would have preferred. I asked myself, "Hilary, if you could "design" your own patient, what would you want?" I thought about the patients that the other students had. Would I rather change colostomy bags? Perhaps dressing weeping amputations? Maybe I'd rather monitor the urine output of the jaundice patient and his dressings on his pancreatic drain? I was confident answering a resounding no. It all grosses me out. I started to think that maybe I hadn't really had such a bad patient, until I remembered how it felt when I heard, "I made a mess again". Aw man...really?? AGAIN?? You were only clean for 15 minutes. How could one person have that much to eliminate?? Now I'm scarred. Every time I walk through stores where large people are riding on those electrical carts, mostly Wal Mart, I now think, "I'll be wiping your butt in a couple years. For God's sake woman, get up and walk to get your hot dogs, frozen pizzas, and Little Debbies. Have some dignity!" Perhaps I'm not the best candidate for this position. I love the idea of becoming a nurse practitioner, but you have to work a year as a nurse before you can apply to that program, so I'm stuck butt-wiping. I'm hoping to find a good school nurse position in which to gain experience. I can handle little kid puke, lice, and pants-wetters...and summers off! Three more semesters, three more semesters, three more semesters...